In this episode Nicnac tries to articulate how finding safe communities that embrace and support who they are in recent times has made them feel. They don’t feel they can adequately express how much these discoveries have helped them and will help them in the times ahead. They also express how damaging attempts to modify or suppress who they are have been over the years. Given that advocating for and creating a global community that embraces diversity and supports people’s needs is their greatest passion, they resolve to continue focusing on this ambition in the hope of allowing others to feel safe and thrive through creative self expression. They hope they can use their podcast and expertise to help others who aspire to self expressive goals.
Nicnac’s work is very much made possible by the safety and support of listeners like you.
They thank you!
The opening music is Raindrop Rhapsody by Josh Eikenberry. The closing music is Catch Me If You Can by Attica Attica. Find them at atticaattica.bandcamp.com.
Nicnac thanks both groups for allowing their creations to be used in the production of other work. Nicnac shares and knows the value of The Creative Commons approach to intellectual creations.
I am separate from most of the world. I’ve rarely fit.
I use systems to get by. I am like a computer app still in beta. There are bugs. Sometimes I crash and I need to escape to the desktop.
Other times I work like a charm.
In the safety of my dark cave I write and speak into the mic. Talking, writing and researching it all till It makes sense.
It’s fun and easy. It is me in the zone.
I speak knowledge. I know it. Most people don’t get it.
It is hard to translate to the right words. That takes a lot of time and energy.
The systems of the world are beautiful. It all relates.
I am somehow connected with others that share my type of mind. I seek nothing but that shared mind. It’s just beginning. The knowledge is growing. I know our minds can join to be appreciated with time.
Check out this wonderful project to see other pieces of the mosaic from first hand accounts from across the community
In this episode Nicnac describes a moment of incredible clarity that they reached at the end of last weekend. An experience that they articulate as something akin to A “Dr. House” style epiphany coupled with the euphoric clearly the character would experience at the end of the majority of the episodes in the 2004-2012 series. They make the best effort they can muster in an attempt to explain their lifelong social, work and daily cognitive experience. They have made a herculean effort to complete this production as they endure the early stages of neurodivergent burn out. They begin the wrap up process by providing recommendations for sources of other first hand accounts of the neurodivergent experience. Capping it all off by sharing a piece of prose that they feel captures their experience in a unique way. If you have feedback or questions please share them with Nicnac. They would be happy to respond and engage with those that are interested.
The opening music is Raindrop Rhapsody by Josh Eikenberry. The closing music is Catch Me If You Can by Attica Attica. Find them here. Nicnac thanks both groups for allowing their creations to be used in the production of other’s work. They do the same!
In this episode Nicnac works to shift their energy and considers what it will take cautiously to spend more time outside of their darkened studio where they’ve spent most of their time since Covid started in March of 2020. They are in the process of accepting the neurodivergent capacity limits they have that cause them to need to work hard to be mindful of their limits when outside of their safe space and interacting with others
In this episode Nicnac is having a rebirth of self after picking a new name to better fit who they are. While they want to embrace the moment for all that it is, they also have a need to process their strife around energy management and the difficulty of living in a culture of compliance. So grab your favorite beverage, grab a breath and join this important moment in Nicnac’s life.
In this episode Nicnac talks about gender and the challenges that arise from trying to navigate the world being as true to themselves and others as possible. They ponder how hard it is to be real in modern society and seek your feedback on how that reflects on our species in the long run.
In this episode Nicnac reviews their more than 30 years of mental health treatment. Over the course of their life they have been diagnosed with a wide variety of illnesses ranging from ADD to Bipolar and Autism. Despite Nicnac’s extensive treatment history, they continue to feel like they are living an endurance test. Having briefly worked in the mental health field, Nicnac reports on some research they’ve been doing into the social model of disability and the use of the term neurodivergent. Nicnac strongly feels that if they take a more assertive approach to getting treatment and interacting with mental health professionals in addition to trying to maximize the positives of their neurodivergence they can turn a corner. Nicnac also refers back to some of their early work and a college essay they wrote describing a hypothetical link between neurodivergence and self actualization. If this could be proven to the greatest degree possible in social science, then Nicnac thinks they may have an alternate design for The US Mental Health System. Nicnacjak. Ever the system designer.
In this episode Nicolas (Nicnac) explores their struggle to find the right balance in social interactions and overcome some insecurities that are currently hampering their ambitions. Nicolas also discusses the fate of their “wellness document” and the struggle to make better audio content. They close out the episode by talking about gender and queerness. Reemphasizing their relatively new belief that social justice progress cannot be solely dependent on non violent direct action. Progress has been enabled on social justice issues through a diverse range of actions including non-violent direct action, legal advocacy, mutual aid and events such as “The Stonewall Riots”.
Show Notes: In this episode Nicolas begins to question their ongoing efforts to change who they are to conform better with neurotypical people. Nicolas refers to The Sims, Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, and a preliminary understanding of Buddhism and the social theory of disability to ground their thinking and consider new approaches to their stuckness. How will it play out? Keep listening to find out!